Best Couple in Konoha
by Rotten Glee
Summary: Gaara and Neji are entered into a contest in Konoha in which couples are pitted against each other to see which is the best. Gaara’s being an ass, and Neji’s having male PMS. Add a side dish of cuteness and you get the perfect meal! GaaNeji.


Title: The Best Couple In Konoha

Author: Kaeru

Pairings: GaaNeji (main), NaruSasu, KakaIru, ItaDei, ShiKiba, TemaShika.

Rating: M/MA

Warnings: Smut!! Smut!! GaaNeji smexiness warning! Err… Anyway, a few curse words here and there, and I guess inappropriate use of a Kazekage's desk…? XD

Summary: Neji and Gaara are (forcefully, on Neji's part) entered into a contest in Konoha, in which couples are pitted against each other to see which is the best. Gaara's being an ass, and Neji's having male PMS. Add a side dish of cuteness and you get the perfect meal! GaaNeji.

Disclaimer: No own Naruto. Now go away and read the fic already.

Kaeru: Kyaaaa!!! I promised makebelievegirl a one-shot with her own choice pairing and she wanted a GaaNeji and somehow I managed to turn it into s two/three-shot instead… (sweatdrops) I really gotta try writing shorter chapters for one-shots and longer ones for actual fics /thinking f Alchemical Pursuits here… XD/)!! Normally I don't write GaaNeji, so if this sucks or something, then please tell me! Well, anyway, read and review!!!

Notes: Okay, in this fic, Gaara was captured by Akatsuki, but never killed. Shukaku had been partially extracted from him and then partially sealed, but not completely, so here, he's like a bigger, fatter, more powerful and less intelligent (but still considerably smart) version of Shikamaru. You'll know what I mean; he's making an appearance later. Anyway, since he's still a bloodthirsty bijuu (tailed-beast), he's still wants blood, so Gaara satisfies him by letting him take over his body during assassinations. On another note, this happens two years after Sasuke's return to Konoha. I'm pretending that by helping his good friend, Naruto, bring back his sweet bishi (XD sweet my ass), Gaara fell in love with Neji for reasons we all can choose to delude ourselves in. Anyway, They've been together ever since and since I'm also pretending that Neji was fifteen during the Sasuke retrieval thing, he's now seventeen and Gaara (whom I believe is a year younger than him, but correct me if I'm wrong) is sixteen. Also, I wanted to make this easier and just pretend Neji was a genin when they got Sasuke back and was promoted into becoming a jounin. So now, Tsunade sent him, upon his request, to stay in Sunagakure as an ambassador of sorts (I have no idea if ambassadors exist in Naruto, but hell if I care!!! XD) for Konohagakure. I think that's all, but err… (shrugs sheepishly) I might forget to mention other things, so if you don't get something, feel free to ask! Anywho, read on!!

PS: The entire idea of the plot and story was makebelievegirl's, so don't steal it or I'll hunt you down and eat your brain!!

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Glossary:

Sunagakure: Hidden Sound Village

Konohagakure: Hidden Leaf Village

Suna: Sand (referring to Sand country in general, but implied Sound Village/since that's where they are/)

Sand nin: Sand ninja (ninja from Hidden Sand Village)

Leaf nin: Leaf ninja (ninja from Hidden Leaf Village)

Kazekage: literally translated into Windshadow (Sand's head and chief and all that jazz; think Hokage /which is literally translated to Fireshadow/).

Koi: lover

Bijuu: tailed-beasts (the demons sealed within Gaara and Naruto)

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Chapter I: Kazekages and Their Offices

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**/Sunagakure\**

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Neji loved mornings.

From where he sat, everything seemed peacefully quiet, and despite the war raging on at the borders of Suna, those little things lost their significance amidst the beauty of dawn breaking. It was times like these that made Neji truly understand and accept that it was his fate to be here. His fate to be with him.

The mornings in Suna vastly differentiated from the mornings in Konoha. In the Hidden Leaf Village, among the branch families and Hiashi-sama's constant 'nagging', so to speak, Neji had always been unable to relax, let alone enjoy any view of darkness giving way to light. But here in Suna, even without his Byakugan, the ebonette could clearly and easily see the little birds flitting about in what little trees there were through the hazy mist-like clouds made by the gently floating sands that played about in the warm breezes. He could count each and every sand grain, in fact, that passed by his pale eyes, and he didn't even need to use any chakra. It was a strange feeling, seeing things the way he was, but a pleasant one, as well.

Yes, Neji loved mornings, but perhaps only ones here in Sunagakure.

Strong, pale arms, though not as pale as his own fair skin, wrapped around him tightly and Neji instinctively grabbed onto them, pushing his back firmly against the hard chest behind him.

"Why are you staring at the sand again?" asked a deep voice gruffly from behind him and Neji mocked a gasp.

"Gaara! That's the longest sentence you've said to me all week!" he exclaimed, though softly. A Hyuuga did not do loud. Unless in bed… Yes, Neji made quite a lot of noise in bed, but that's not the point.

Gaara grunted in reply and squeezed Neji's thigh through the thin white fabric of his robe. "Funny, Hyuuga," he murmured, burying his face into the back of the ebonette's neck, sniffing the sweet scent of his long hair.

"I was just… thinking, is all," replied Neji, smiling softly at the redhead's action.

There was a muffled reply and Neji craned his neck a little to peer over his shoulder at the sand nin. "What?"

Gaara raised his head and kissed Neji gently on the lips before replying. "I _said_, you do that too much."

Neji's smile quirked into a smirk and the ebonette turned around in the other's embrace to face him fully. He wound his own arms around the slightly taller teen's neck and stared into bright emerald orbs seductively while leaning in closely to allow his lips to hover over Gaara's.

"Well, perhaps you should _do_ something about that?" he said suggestively, emphasizing the word 'do' by moving in ever so closer so his lips were now practically touching the sand nin's.

Gaara smirked in response and promptly took the ebonette's challenge, smashing their lips together forcefully. Neji halfheartedly fought with the other tongue in his mouth for dominance, but gave in almost instantly when the redhead moved his hands from around his waist to cup his butt cheeks and squeeze.

Neji moaned into Gaara's mouth, not caring when he felt the other teen smirk into the kiss and merely pressing his front closer to the redhead's. Gaara's hands began to roam up and down his sides as their mouths continued to suck onto each other, teeth clashing and blood spilling slightly from a cut on Neji's bruising lips. Neji whimpered when Gaara's hands gripped his hips tightly and ground their groins together forcefully and his own delicate fingers entwined themselves in Gaara's flaming red locks.

"Ngh-! G-Gaa- ah! Gaara!" gasped the ebonette, as their mouths disconnected for much needed air and Gaara began to almost immediately latch onto his neck, sucking and nibbling and sending waves of pain and pleasure down his spine.

Gaara smirked into his neck and pushed him closer against himself by the hips, eliciting another loud moan from the flushed Hyuuga.

"What –nip- do you –lick- want-bite- Neji-suck-?" he murmured huskily between attacks on the pale expanse of skin.

Neji groaned when his arousal grazed against another equally hard _thing_ as Gaara ground their hips together again, and spluttered incoherently when Gaara's hand moved from his hip to cup his lower regions.

"Gaa- ah!- ra!" he cried out, bucking his hips forward in a reflexive manner, his hands untwining from Gaara's hair to grip firm, broad shoulders barely concealed by a robe similar to Neji's own. "S-stop teas- ngh!- ing!"

Gaara's smirk widened at the pleasant reaction from the ebonette and he complied, removing his hand from Neji's hard on to grab his hips more firmly and hoist him up. Neji obediently lifted his legs and wrapped them around Gaara's waist, allowing the redhead to roughly kiss him again as he moved them both somewhere else.

Neji soon found himself dumped onto a hard wooden desk and for a moment, he raised a brow at the other nin, forgetting his neglected arousal in favor of being shocked as to why they were in Gaara's Kazekage office. The redhead merely shrugged his shoulders and tilted his head slightly to enjoy the view of a flushed Neji, whose robes were falling off his shoulders (showing more of his deliciously pale, tender skin) and barely hiding the fully hard dick standing proud in between his spread legs (Gaara doubted the other boy even knew his legs were spread, since the Hyuuga would usually hide his nether regions from anyone /even the redhead, sadly/ at even the slightest hint of showing skin any higher than his shins). Damn if the boy wasn't hot and begging to be fucked senseless.

"We can't do it here, Gaara!" protested Neji, pulling the lapels of his robe back over his shoulders (and pulling Gaara out of his daydreams), his flushed cheeks turning redder. "This is where people come to see you. _Important_ people."

Gaara didn't seem to be listening as he advanced on the slightly smaller boy, and Neji nervously crawled back, pushing himself further to the middle of the large desk. The redhead was quick as lightning and before Neji could even react, strong hands were pulling at his wrists, pinning his hands over his head, and a heavy body pushed him onto his back as soft, slightly-itchy sand pulled at his ankles. His legs were pulled apart gently, but firmly and Neji glared up at a smug-looking redhead.

"Gaara," he growled lowly. "Get off. Right now."

Gaara tilted his head slightly to the side in mock thought and smirked before shaking his head. "I think not." He nuzzled the ebonette's neck and the Hyuuga bit his already-cut lip to keep himself from moaning aloud at the sensations flowing through his body as the warmth of the redhead's breaths hovered above the hickeys Gaara had made only moments before. "I like you like this," said Gaara, pulling back and gazing down at Neji.

The ebonette tried to glare harder, but Gaara was no longer paying attention to his face and was now releasing his hands. The calloused skin of Gaara's digits were replaced by the same itchy-soft sand holding down his ankles and Neji pulled a little at his restraints before gasping when the sand around his ankles began to vibrate steadily, sending the tremors up his shins and legs and eventually meeting his groin.

Forgetting totally about where they were, the Hyuuga's pale eyes fluttered close as a loud moan escaped his bruised lips. A hand cupped his hard on through the thin fabric of his robe and Neji bucked his hips upward for more contact, whimpering when that was denied him by the means of another hand holding him down.

"Patience, koi," murmured Gaara huskily, licking at the side of Neji's pale neck, earning a shudder of pleasure from the ebonette.

Neji had less patience than Naruto at that moment, but he could do nothing but whimper again; Gaara was strong, even with just one hand. Gaara chuckled throatily at the obvious lack of a certain virtue from the Hyuuga, and licked his neck again before lowering his head and latching onto a pale nipple. The redhead bit on it and smirked when another moan escaped Neji, whose back arched slightly at the action. Pleased, Gaara bit a little harder before releasing the hardening nub and licking it gently, before nibbling on it. His other hand moved away from Neji's arousal (making the ebonette whimper again) to tease his other nipple to hardness.

Neji's back arched fully and all the ebonette wanted at the moment was to grab the redhead's head and kiss him fully and thoroughly.

"Gaara!" he gasped, when said sand nin moved from his nipples to biting on the plains of his flat stomach. He tried to buck his hips again, but Gaara's other hand was still on his hip and holding him down. "Ngh… Gaara- hn!"

Gaara loved the noises he was getting from the ebonette, but as much as he enjoyed torturing the smaller teen, he had to admit, he was getting a bit impatient as well. His dick was already leaking, and he was sure Neji's was probably crying rivers of pre-cum. Ceasing his ministrations on the Hyuuga's lower abdomen, the redhead took a moment to survey his work with pride (there were several large hickeys already forming on the ebonette's body, and several more on his neck) before pulling the robe apart where it was bulging and wet.

Painfully slowly, Gaara licked the tip of Neji's erection, and the ebonette bucked his hips against the sand nin's hand again as a particularly loud moan filled the room. Gaara swirled a tongued over the head, eliciting an impatient whimper from the Hyuuga, and finally took the ebonette into his mouth.

Neji was in heaven. The heat, the warmth, the wetness of Gaara's cavern had him practically cumming there and there. He couldn't even think at all, let alone think straight, when the redhead began to suck, his head bobbing up and down on the ebonette's dick. The pale teen could just barely raise his head to watch the sand nin at work, and he found himself leaking all the more at the erotic sight of the Kazekage of Sunagakure giving him head.

Gaara lapped at the pre-cum leaking from Neji's tip and teased the slit lightly with his tongue before swallowing the pre-cum gathering in his mouth and releasing Neji's arousal from his mouth. He smirked again when he heard Neji whimper, and gripped the base of the pale teen's erection as he leaned down and kissed the Hyuuga on the lips.

Neji gladly returned the rough kiss and moaned again when he tasted something sticky and salty around the corners of the other's lips. He could feel Gaara's slow strokes on his manhood with his one hand and tried to push Gaara downwards with his mouth.

"G-Gaara," he breathed, eyes dark with lust as he gazed up at the redhead. Gaara kissed him briefly on the lips again before nodding and smirking.

Neji took in a breath as a familiar, calloused finger poked at his entrance, wincing slightly as another finger joined it and simultaneously entered him. Gaara paused and looked at him, and nodded quickly to indicate it was fine. He was used to more painful injuries from missions, anyway.

Gaara quickly stretched the pale teen sufficiently, scissoring his fingers and poking at the slight bump he found easily inside the slightly smaller teen. He could tell the other's prostate was being stimulated, judging from the increasingly short, breathy pants from the ebonette beneath him, and finally exited the Neji's hole after a few more poking and stretching.

"Brace yourself," he murmured throatily as he positioned the tip of his erection at the ebonette's entrance. Neji didn't even have time to blink before the redhead impaled him.

A gasp escaped him as pain shot up his spine. Pleasure came soon after as Gaara gently moved to aim and a second thrust got him moaning again. Neji was seeing stars as his prostate was hit over and over again. Gaara's free hand was on his dick now and Neji gasped as overwhelming pleasure made him arch his back.

Gaara gripped Neji's arousal firmly as he pumped it, matching the strokes with his thrusting. In, out, in, out; they were both fast approaching their release and Gaara gave one final thrust before Neji spilled all over his hand, screaming his name.

"Gaara!" cried out the ebonette, eyes closed shut in pleasure as he sprayed his essence between their chests and the sand nin's hand.

Gaara came soon after as Neji's insides clenched around him in almost painful pleasure. He didn't cry out like the ebonette, as was usual, but as he collapsed on Neji, his hands moved automatically to embrace the other teen tightly, resting his head in the crook of the Hyuuga's neck.

Neji smiled faintly as he moved his now-freed hands to wander down the redhead's back before resting them in his hair. He sighed contentedly for a moment and closed his eyes tiredly before something occurred to him and his pale eyes snapped open immediately.

"Gaara."

The call was more of a statement than a call, and Gaara grunted against Neji's neck, too tired to answer, or perhaps just too lazy to actually form any words.

"We just did it in your office."

The redhead stiffened slightly on top of the ebonette before he sighed internally. _Here we go…_

"FUCKIGN HELL! GAARA! WE JUST _DID IT_ IN YOUF OFFICE!!"

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Three hours later found Gaara lazily sitting at the edge of the roof of his sand-dirt mansion, one of his black-rimmed eyes considerably blacker.

Well, if the Hyuuga couldn't fight, Gaara wouldn't have decided to mate with him in the first place. He had to admit though, it really hurt. A lot. And not just his eye either. Neji had even bothered to shut off a few of his chakra points. Really. He personally thought _that_ was unnecessary.

_You're lucky he didn't do anything else…_ murmured a voice in his mind lazily.

Gaara's facial expression didn't change, but internally, he felt he had a right to look indignant.

_It's not like he didn't like it_ pointed out the redhead. He was pouting in his head, though he would never admit it.

_Yes, yes, I know,_ replied the voice slowly, as though even forming the words took all of its energy. A large, brownish figure appeared in the dark recesses of Gaara's mind and the redhead watched as the tanuki slowly (as in S-L-O-W-L-Y) crawled closer to him, its normally shining purple eyes glowing dully in the darkness and half-closed. _But, you see… Subs are very complex. They're so sensitive, they might as well be females. And they hold grudges to the ends of the earth. Never anger one, just as you should never anger a female. It's just asking for trouble._

_Hmm… Whatever. He'll calm down, anyway_shrugged Gaara, letting out a breath.

Shukaku grunted (it was more of a small wisp of a breath, really) and lay down on the ground. _He always does, ne? Now, what about my dinner, hmm…?_

Gaara rolled his eyes. _It's still lunch, Shukaku_

_But… I feel hungry…_ protested the bijuu tiredly, not even sounding like he was really disagreeing.

_Then you have to wait_replied Gaara easily. _The next assassination won't be requested until after dusk. You'll be able to eat all you want, then_

Another Shukaku-grunt sounded before Gaara found himself alone in his mind and without a word, he too left that small space inside him.

"Gaara!"

Had the redhead not been a cold-hearted, bloodthirsty, downright selfish bastard for eleven years straight, and had had the practice of looking unaffected by anything in his surroundings, he would've probably fallen off the ledge. In front of him, barely an inch away, stood Temari, upside down on the clothes' line of an apartment building nearby, her face scrunched up in curiosity.

Gaara cursed her silently as a chibi form of him fell to a black ground with a mushroom breath leaving him and an enormous sweat drop forming on his head in his mind. On the outside, the redhead merely blinked.

"What?" he said tersely.

Temari's face turned into a grimace as she rolled her eyes. "Someone from Konohagakure just arrived. She's in your office with Neji."

Gaara froze for a moment. All he heard was Konohagakure, a she, his office and Neji. Neji. With a girl. From Konoha. Most probably alone. In his office. Where they'd just had sex not four hours ago. He could see red all over the beige/yellow walls of the buildings surrounding him.

Without so much as a breath, he left Temari alone, still upside down on the string, his sand hovering around him dangerously. A sand nin feeding a few birds outside his mansion jumped at the sight of him and quickly bowed lowly as he passed, but Gaara ignored him. Another sand nin, a girl no older than Temari, was cuddling two identical-looking boys, and she, too, jumped before bowing lowly to Gaara, while the boys in her arms stared tearfully at him. He assumed it was because his eyes were burning with rage. He wasn't sure. He didn't care, either.

After scaring the shit out of three more sand nins (and one visiting leaf nin, who had the misfortune to have his feet stomped under Gaara's), the redhead finally reached his office, and by then, his rage was barely in check.

He didn't even knock on the door (hell, it was _his_ office, anyway; why should he have to knock?) and just burst right through the thick wood, his sand contributing in turning the heavy, thick board from a now-wasted tree into three inch splinters that were flying all over the place.

His eyes were still burning, and he wasn't even trying to hide that fact. In all actuality, he was hoping it would get his point across to whoever it was that was probably flirting with _his_ Neji (Neji was hot, dammit, and Gaara was more than aware that other people thought so, too). Yea; that point.

Of course, his efforts were all but wasted (just like the poor tree which had been turned into a door and now mere splinters of its once finery) when his eyes rested upon the familiar face of Neji's ex-team mate.

"Gaara-sama, pleasure to see you again," greeted Tenten, standing from the chair she had been sitting in to bow respectfully. Her face was lit with a bright smile, and she obviously didn't know Gaara's point. A point which the redhead now felt was quite useless to try to get across, since the girl already knew Neji and he were involved. It didn't help to calm down his possessive streak, though. Or lessen his (secret) embarrassment.

So, grunting in reply to the greeting, Gaara stalked up to Neji (who was staring wide-eyed at the mess that was once a door that was once an oxygen-producing tree and was now a waste of fine greenery), pulled him close by the waist and pulled him down on his lap in the chair he'd assumed the ebonette had been sitting in moments before the Kazekage arrived.

Neji blinked and blushed slightly when he realized where, or rather, _what_ he was sitting on, but just smiled politely at Tenten, who was beaming ever more so.

"Tenten, you were saying what brought you here?" he asked softly, trying to ignore how pleasant it was to have Gaara so close to him and to remember that he was still angry at the redhead for forcing him into _doing it_ right in this very room (even though he loved every second of it).

"Right!" she said happily. "As I was saying (_distinctly added under her breath was_; before somebody destroyed the innocent, totally guiltless door so very rudely), there's a contest being held in Konoha."

Neji nodded to indicate that he understood that part and for her to continue and she did.

"Anyway, a lot of people are entering, like Naruto, Sasuke, Kakashi, Iruka, and a lot of the others. I came because I wanted to know if you and Gaara-sama would like to enter as well," she continued. "It's a pretty simple contest, really, but you have to enter as a pair."

Neji raised a brow at the last sentence. "A pair?" he said. "What sort of contest is this?"

At this, Tenten nervously rubbed the back of her head. "Err… Well, that is… It's sort of a couples' contest…"

Neji narrowed his eyes. "A couples' contest?" he said quietly. "Tenten… You didn't… Did you?"

Tenten was laughing a little oddly at that, here eyes looking at anything but Neji and Gaara. "Well, you see, Neji-san, it's just that… Naruto was being, well… And with Sasuke and Kakashi and all… And even Itachi-san was…," she struggled to say. Then blurted out, a little exasperatedly, "Well, Naruto and Kakashi were saying how you and Gaara would never join anything like this and Itachi said something about how easy it would be to win even if you two _did_ join and I got really angry, so I went to Tsunade-sama and entered you both!"

There was heavy silence in the room as Tenten stared at the floor, looking rightly ashamed. Neji was torn between ripping her head off for doing such a stupid thing and patting her back and telling her that he was grateful about how she stood up for him. Of course, ripping her head off was looking a like a more appealing option.

Just as he opened his mouth to tell her that there was no way in all the nine levels of hell would he participate in the contest, Gaara beat him to it.

"We'll go."

Neji was now torn between fainting in shock, and ripping off Gaara's head, too. And though ripping off the sand nin's head was just as appealing as ripping off Tenten's, his mind seemed to prefer fainting, and faint he did. Right into the arms of his lover.

Gaara smirked slightly as he firmly held Neji up. He had thought that the idea of the two of them entering such a ridiculous thing was beyond nonsensical until the concept of showing off to everyone out there just who the Hyuuga belonged to snaked into his mind. Really, they should've sealed a snake demon inside him instead.

Tenten, meanwhile, seemed oblivious to her ex-team mate's fainting spell and smiled brightly at Gaara's answer.

"Really?" she squealed. "Oh, that's wonderful! The contest will be held in Konohagakure in a week's time! Just enough time if we leave tomorrow!"

Gaara nodded absentmindedly and looked down at Neji's beautiful unconscious face. They would leave tomorrow; he was fine with that. He was looking forward to showing the ebonette off, anyway.

This was going to be fun.

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_Tbc…_

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Kaeru: So? Review!! Lolz. Oh, and please remember that we should not waste tress by destroying perfectly good doors (goes off to give Gaara a piece of her mind for destroying his office door XD).


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